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To the Girl Who Feels Behind

I remember the days full of daydreams that would take me to my twenties with a big famous dream job, husband, and a couple of kids, all before reaching 30. Unsure how everything would flow, I knew everything just "had" to happen; after all, things always work out in the end, right?

I painted the perfect white picket fence picture of how much better my life would be once I achieved those things, how I could finally escape into pure happiness. All those things would magically happen once you reach a certain age.

And I couldn't wait.

In reality, I didn't get a job right after college. I struggled to get and keep a career until my mid-twenties. I had a major breakup and "failed" to have any relationship. And I blamed myself for it all.

I didn't feel purpose whatsoever, and old demons kept resurfacing. So I continued my uncertain path, settling and wishing my heart away. I tried new things. I tried anything that could make my life a little happier. Although nothing stuck, I gained confidence and lessons for the future.

I didn't get married and have kids in my early twenties. I finally found "the one" at 27, got engaged at 31, and married at 33.

While I still don't feel settled, I know I am on a journey, my journey. Trusting in God has been tremendous, and after all my experiences, I know I am on the right path. A path of healing and self-discovery that I so needed, even if I had to endure scary health battles and sacrifice a piece of my soul momentarily to get to the other side.

For the girl who feels behind:

  • You are so loved already and have unique God-given gifts. Your time will come.

  • Finding "the one" doesn't define you as a person.

  • Your health and happiness should always come first, and never sacrifice your soul for a job, relationship, please someone else, etc.

  • Think outside of the box; what do you love doing?

  • You are capable, no matter your age or stage.

  • Surround yourself with positivity! (probably the most significant piece of advice)

  • Relax a little more and enjoy each day.

  • Your dreams will come true, even if they don't happen as described in your head in a perfected timeline.

  • They may look distorted, but you will eventually see the beauty behind the madness.

  • Keep doing the next right thing.

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